Living Is Easy with Your Eyes Closed

I have no idea what day it is… Wednesday, I think? The days and nights are so blurry here, and it is so easy to lose track of time. They all seem to blend together. I do know that today is my dear birthday bunny Jen’s birthday. Happy Birthday, my sweet friend. Thank you for being a rock for me these past five months. I love you dearly <3 I hope you had a beautiful day.

My morning started off great with my friend Melissa bringing coffee and her gorgeous smile. Ronan wasn’t up for visitors and kicked her out of the room, so we went into the hallway and caught up for a bit. Ronan would scream for me every so often, so I would go in and tell him I was looking for Dr. Wood. He seemed satisfied with that answer, so I was able to go back into the hallway and finish my conversation with Melissa.

After she left, I was able to get out of the hospital for most of the day. It was much needed. Mimi Kay and Papa Charlie came and sat with Ronan for me. So thankful. I can feel myself going a little stir-crazy. It was nice to be out and about today.

I returned around 5 to a happy Ronan and our three-year-old roommate, Angel, who had been left alone almost the entire day. He told me that his parents were never coming back. These are the same parents who left him alone last night for about an hour. When I asked Angel where they went, he replied, “They went to smoke.” OMG. I spent the next two hours tending to him and sharing Ronan’s popsicles and toys. I felt bad for the little boy.

He started throwing things at Ronan, which made Ronan upset, and the two of them were screaming back and forth at each other. Ronan ended up in tears because the roommate said to him, “You’re a bad boy!” Ronan looked at me and said, “I not a bad boy, Mama!” I told him, of course, he was not, but that didn’t stop the little tears from sliding down his cheeks. He is so tough, but he really got his feelings hurt tonight.

There wasn’t a nurse in sight on the third floor to handle this, so I did the best I could. That third floor is a little coo-coo. Dr. Eshun gave us the green light to move to the second floor tonight, thank God. We moved down here after the Angel incident, and his parents had still not returned. We are just happy to be out of that room and back on our fun floor with the BEST nurses in the world. They were all so excited to see Ronan, and he was just as happy to see them. The second floor is like our second home now. It was weird to be here but not with our “family.” Somebody even wrote “Rockstar Ronan” on the whiteboard where all the nurses’ and patients’ info goes. So cute that they know his nickname. We are happy campers to be back down here, and Ro baby is sound asleep.

His ANC was still at 0 as of this morning. Ugh. Please let it come up tomorrow. We are itching to get out of here and be back home.

Somebody sent goodies tonight, and I have no idea who they came from, as there was no card. It was a bag full of Star Wars toys, fun books, and coffee for me. Any takers??!?! Please let me know who you are. I would like to give you a proper thank-you. It made our night! Ronan has been having a blast with his coloring books and little lightsaber racing car. THANK YOU!!!!!

I’m getting anxious and homesick tonight. Hoping I can unwind with a movie or something. I could seriously use some yoga in my life right about now. I feel like I have a lot to say, but my mind, body, and soul are shutting down. Hospital exhaustion is kicking in.

I am so thankful for my thoughtful husband and the Bose headphones he bought me for Christmas. Music is saving my life through all of this. Thanks, Wooddawg, for being so thoughtful all the time. You are the best gift-giver in the entire world.

Hope you all have a beautiful, blessed night. Sweetest dreams.

Extra special dreams tonight to my dear Charisma. I told you all the stars would end up aligning for you. More good things are coming your way, my dear. I can feel it.

xoxo