No news is good news, yes??

I find it impossible that I am even still standing after today. Let alone, writing this post. I’m not sure how I’m even awake at this point. I didn’t much sleep last night and we woke up early to get Ronan ready for his day. He was mad that I woke him up from his peaceful slumber and even more mad that he had to drink his contrast before we could head to the hospital for his CT scan. I power talked him though it, although he fought me the entire time. Ronan is such a hard headed little boy and after battling with him almost the entire day, I am mentally beat. There was a lot of distracting, playing, bribing, and threatening today to get him through what we had to do. I have am so glad to be in our bed and over with today and am not looking forward to tomorrow at all. Scan days are always brutal and I know 110% that I would have crumbled today had it not been for Fernanda. She was such a big help.

We arrived to the clinic and were told that Ronan needed platelets again because his were still very low despite the platelets he received yesterday. We had plenty of time before our CT scan was scheduled so we went and got his platelets started. While we were getting them, Ronan fell asleep on the little couch next to me. Fernanda and I sat and watched him sleep and quietly talked. We both tried to block out the sounds of the screaming boy next to us who was about Ronan’s age. The poor thing must have screamed bloody murder for a good half an hour. I felt so helpless and so sad for the child and parents. I told Fernanda sometimes watching the parents go through this is almost harder than watching the kids. It is a lose lose situation for everyone involved and never gets any easier to see.

After Ronan was finished with his platelets, we headed down to get his CT scan done. I must have been told by 5 different people that he needed to be ready for anesthesia, even though I told everyone that he didn’t need it today. We got down to the CT room and sure enough the nurse came up to me and on her piece of paper says the word, Anesthesia, in big red letters. As soon as I saw this I told her that Ronan would not need anesthesia today. She looked at me like I had three heads and said that she wasn’t told this but that we could try it without, first. We went back to the room and I put Ronan on the table as he clutched onto his Star Wars guys. I had prepped him all morning for how he had to hold still and how it was going to be a piece of cake, just like radiation. He understood the drill and was very excited that I was able to stay in the room with him this time, unlike RT where I had to leave him all alone. The whole CT scan took about 10 minutes. He held so still and I acted out a scene from Star Wars for him with his Clone Troopers and told him all about the secret mission they were going on with him. He smiled the entire time and listened with his big eyes looking up at the CT machine. I was so proud of him; once again. He truly amazes me with how brave and strong he is. When we finished, all the techs told them how great of a job he did and he gave them all knuckles as he walked out the door. Such a little Rockstar, my Ronan.

I’m not sure where the rest of the day went. We had to wait around forever to get Ronan’s MIBG injection for tomorrow’s scans. We ran out for a bit and went to Dylan’s Candy Shop which I am totally over at this point. Four trips there, in the past 3 weeks for overpriced candy and you cannot even move in the store due to it being jam packed with people. If I never have to see that place again, I will be so happy. And this coming from me, an avid candy connoisseur, is huge. I’m done with that place. After Dylan’s, Fernanda was about to pass out from being on the “Maya diet,” which consists of not eating, so I took her to 4 carrots to eat. I pretended to eat a half of a sandwich for her, but she busted me and gave me a very stern but loving talking to about my lack of food. Ronan and Fernanda ate which was all that mattered to me. I did take a small Fro Yo to go and ate the whole thing for her. That’s the best I could do today.

I asked a few times if Dr. Kushner would read the results of the CT for me today and I got put off which I kind of expected. Everybody reassured me that if there was something that was not good, he would have come to talk to me. I hope they are not eating their words tomorrow. I’m going with the no news, is good news approach tonight so I can hopefully sleep a little easier.

We got back to the RMH later this afternoon and Fernanda hung out for a while. I practically had to force her out the door and told her to get some rest even though she tried to say she was coming back later this evening. I was not having it as she needs her rest too. My friends, Ed and Diane who are in town with their two little boys came by to see us. We had been looking forward to seeing them all day. They came armed with enough toys for Christmas. Ronan was in heaven not only because of the toys, but even more so because he had two boys to play with. He should have been wiped out from today, but he ran around here and played with those two until 9:45 tonight. It was so good for him and made him so happy. Thank you, Ed and Di. You two and your boys were just what we needed after a long and hard hospital day. I am so blessed to call you my friends.

Alright my dears. This is all I have tonight. I hope you all had a beautiful day full of many blessings. Tomorrow is a huge day for us and I am going to be channeling all of your strength and love. Sweetest dreams to you all.


15 responses to “No news is good news, yes??”

  1. praying, praying, praying.
    won’t stop praying…
    hang in there Mama Bear.
    you are doing great!

  2. You are an amazing woman and beautiful mother! I am praying for you and Ro! Thank you for sharing this journey with us! I found a hat that I would LOVE to send to Rockstar Ronan. If that is ok, can you email me an address where I could send it? I saw it and instantly thought of your beautiful boy! sweet dreams momma!

  3. Thank you so much for keeping “Team Ronan” posted. I stayed up a little late tonight constantly checking for updates on your precious Ronan. I too kept reminding myself that “no news is good news” so I’m going with that same idea for the CT scan results. I am praying that tomorrow will reveal what we all already know…Ronan is kicking some Cancer butt!! Ronan looks so beautiful, sleeping so peacefully..he just melts my heart ❤ Sending lots of love & prayers for tomorrow!! Sweet Dreams..

  4. Thought are with you and your family! Hang in there, all will be well.

  5. Praying for good news. Hang in there. Fight on! Positive thoughts.

  6. Lord I am thanking You for all the wonderful blessings that have come along thus far for this family..for the endurance, hope and love that they show each other…also thanking You for all the friends and doctors and their staff that work so hard to take care of Ronan and all the children who have cancer. Have mercy on all their families Lord and bring Your hope and healing to them all. Bring comfort from Your Hold Spirit…thank You so much for all the friends that do their part in all of this..You provide so much Lord. Continue to bless this family with a good report tomorrow. In Jesus name amen.

  7. Praying without ceasing. Love to you all.

  8. I pray for Gods will as if we pray for anything else it wont be right so,with that being said Jesus wants to take care of the little children so he will take care of baby Ro and give his mama(the best mama that I dont know)the continued strength to carry on…thats where all your strength has come from ya know and you are one tough cookie.You r such a great mama and ya just know by reading these day after day.Anyone would be LUCKY to have you for their mama and lets thank God for all that power you have!!

  9. Rita Dickinson Avatar
    Rita Dickinson

    channeling, channeling, channeling – and thinking of you and the Rockstar constantly today!

  10. Praying that today goes well…that the results from the CT scan are good and for a peace that surpasses all understanding as you wait for more information on his treatment plan. xo michelle

  11. Maya dear, I too stared at Ronan. But my stare was at a very precious sleeping Angel. What a blessing he is.
    Easter blessings to all of you and many prayers
    and massive amounts of love coming your way.

  12. We are all praying for good results for that beautiful precious Ronan. He is in a miracle that is going to prove he will go against all odds a beat them…keep faith. We love you are surrounded by love.

  13. I sit here at midnight praying for good news. I am going crazy not hearing anything. Please God, give Ronan the strength to get through this terrible disease. PLEASE heal this beautiful child…..

  14. He is such a beautiful boy! Looks so peaceful & I can tell he is having wonderful dreams (:

  15. Paula Mc Emerson Avatar
    Paula Mc Emerson

    You should be so proud of yourself and your beautiful family my thoughts are with you all xxx

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