Poppy didn’t die and the SpiritHoods already SOLD OUT!!!!


Ronan. This is seriously my life. Last night, I was cooking dinner and I had Poppy in the sink. Let me back up a bit. Every morning and every night, when Poppy eats her solid food, I put her naked in her Bumbo chair in the sink. She gets so messy, so I feed her in there as it makes perfect sense because she is SO messy and I can just wash her off afterwords. (Hi, that’s me OCD clean freak) She likes to sit in her little chair, play with her rattles, and suck on this mesh thing that I put avocados or bananas in. Last night, while I was cooking dinner, Poppy was playing away and sucking on her little mesh holder with her mashed up avocado in it. I turned around for about 30 seconds to tend to my tacos and when I turned back around, Poppy was slumped over in her little Bumbo seat with her head down. I dropped my spatula, screamed her name, and ran over and ripped her out of her chair. The water wasn’t on or anything, but my mind instantly went to, “She’s dead, she’s dead, she’s dead.” As soon as I ripped her out of that chair, she started to cry because I scared her so badly. She wasn’t dead. The poor little babe had fallen asleep, probably because she was so worn out from our very busy day of putting her in a pumpkin and taking pictures.

I felt so bad for scaring her and making her cry because I am a raging lunatic. I felt so badly, yet I know this is the way I will always be. My mind will always go to the worst place possible. I said to my friend, Katie today as we were hiking, “It takes everything I have not to take all 3 of my kids down to PCH to have them scanned from head to toe.” And I’m not kidding. It’s a fight I have with myself everyday in my head. Just because this has happened to us once, does not mean it cannot happen again. That’s not the way life works. I am fully aware of that. I live in a world where all of my kids are going to die and everything they touch or eat, is going to give them cancer. I’m so freaked out by anything that Poppy puts in her mouth, food wise. It was pretty much only organic for you and your brothers. I mean, I even made all of your baby food from scratch. Now, I’m positivly a freak about it with Poppy. And if you think I have issues there, you should see the way I pretty much refuse to leave her with anyone. I mean, I even worry when I leave her with your Daddy for a bit. The separation anxiety I am having with her might become a problem. I can’t leave her and when I do, I’m a ball of nerves. This is my life and as of now,  this is just the way it is. Maybe it will change or maybe it won’t. I don’t know how you ever go back to anything ever feeling o.k. and safe again after you’ve watched one of your children, die from cancer.

So, I started this earlier today… before the amazingness of the SpiritHoods Spicy Monkey SELLING OUT happened! Are you guys serious?! I mean, I expected them to sell, but not that fast! You all are amazing. Don’t worry, our friends at SpiritHoods will be making more. I don’t think anybody expected them to sell out so fast. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! This is beyond rad. Tonight, I can go to sleep feeling so proud because this is proof that my little guy is changing the world with the help of all of you. I really, really needed this today, so thank you all again for being so supportive. And another HUGE thank you to my brother from another mother, Alexander from SpiritHoods, who shot this video and has been working along my side through this whole thing. He is going to change this world with me and help save some kids’ lives, just you all wait and see. This is just a little taste as of what is to come.

I’m signing off for tonight. More book writing to do. I miss you. I love you. I hope you are safe, Ronan. I love you to the moon and back


I love you all, too. Thank you for helping in this fight and for being better people because of my son.


12 responses to “Poppy didn’t die and the SpiritHoods already SOLD OUT!!!!”

  1. I am thrilled Poppy is alive! These things happens and is totally normal for us to react the way you did. Our children are such a precious gift, that I think sometimes we are afraid that someone or something will take them away from us (F.U. Cancer, BTW). I used to wake up several times during the night just make sure they were still breathing…
    Don’t worry, or do, but I’m sure Poppy and the boys will be ok. They have to be ok, life can’t be such a bitch as to hurt you and your family further.
    Take care and bring more of those amazing hoods, I want one for my isabel (she’s is the one who brought you and Ronan into my life, so I know she will love it)
    Lots of love from Madrid

  2. Just the description of Poppy slumped over in her little Bumbo chair flipped me out…I’m glad she’s okay and I don’t think you’re a raging lunatic at all…just a broken hearted mum.

    I knew those spirit hoods would sell out – what else would you expect from your RoLovies? xo

  3. Elizabeth Sousa Avatar
    Elizabeth Sousa

    It’s so badass that the hoods sold out in 5 hours!!! Of course they did ;0)

    Love to you always, Rockstar Mama xx

  4. These are SO CUTE! I had never even heard of these before but they are absolutely adorable and I want one for my little peanut! I can’t wait for them to make more, hopefully I can be on top of it next time. The video is absolutely amazing, you should be very proud! You don’t know me, but I have been reading your blog for some time now and it’s given me a completely different perspective on life and the way we live it. I just love your honesty. Hugs to you from IL Maya, you are changing the world!!! #fucancer

  5. My heart was racing reading about Poppy. Then I laughed OCD lol

    Maya’s mafia
    Rolove always!

  6. Today was the first time I was filled with every kind of happy when something I really wanted to order online was sold out! No frustrations here! It’s a bitterly cold and rainy day here in Indy, but I have the warm & fuzzies all over because this is RoMazing! When the Spicy Monkey SpiritHoods are available again, I’ll be ordering enough for my kids, my nephews & my dear friend, Cathy Terhune. She’s the incredible gal who sent you her support for the White House petition while she was in Disney with her kiddos last January. Cathy’s stage 4 GBM is progressing rapidly. A Spicy Monkey will brighten her day…can’t wait to place our order! 💜🐵💛🐵💜🐵💛🐵💜🐵💛🐵💜🐵

  7. So awesome that they are already sold out (though so bummed I didn’t get to order my four!). Please keep us posted as to when there are more available. SO AWESOME! What a great video … love every bit of it. You are making a difference, Maya. Ro knows. ❤

  8. aw – Poppy falling asleep in her bumbo – I’m sorry it gave you such a fright!! That’s wonderful news about the Spirithoods – I had no doubt the RonanArmy would show up in full force!! You’re beautiful little boy has inspired many – your fierce determination to change things for other kids fighting has inspired many too!! Together you guys are really making a difference.

  9. There were some kinds in my class talking about Taylor Swift and then one girl said didn’t she write a song about a little boy who passed away from cancer? And usually I don’t really talk to people, but I heard that and said “yeah”. And she asked why write about him, why not all the other kids who die from cancer. I explained to her that you have an incredible blog, that Ronan inspired many, and that you are actually doing something about child hood cancer. She seemed surprised that I knew all this, but I was happy I told her so that another person in this world could know Ronan’s story.

    I love you guys,

  10. Michelle Murfin Avatar
    Michelle Murfin

    I would love to get a Spirithood but I can’t afford it. I know Ronan is watching all of this happen and I know he’s so proud of you 🙂 He has no reason not to be ❤

  11. This may sound weird but you’re very good at writing about tragic events. Your description of little Poppy slumped over made me freak out a bit even though I knew she must be fine. Your descriptions of Ronan last few weeks were heart-wrenching. No wonder Taylor Swift chose you of all random people to co-write a song with. I already know I’ll be crying buckets over your book.

  12. Soo glad that Poppy is ok. After outliving 2 of my sons my mind always races to the worst places so I totally understand why yours goes there too.

    Looking forward to when more spirithoodies are available. FU CANCER!!

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