Stronger than yesterday

Today is the kind of day where I look at Ronan and I’m not scared. I know 100% in my heart that he is going to survive this. How could he not? He looks normal, he is acting like his crazy 3-year-old self, and he does not look the slightest bit sick. I know this will not be the case everyday… but it fills me with such hope, determination, and love. At the beginning of all of this I felt this way. When Woody and I were sitting in a tiny room together at the hospital, after hearing the diagnosis…. Woody completely broke down. I grabbed him and looked him in the eyes and said, “Listen to me. I am not scared! I am not scared at all!  He is going to beat this. We can get him through this… he CAN get through this!” I know  in that moment a lot of that not being scared business was the shock and numbness I was feeling. It was how I needed to feel and act at that time to get my husband not to pass out and to believe with me. I’ve had plenty of days where I am scared since then. But today is not one of them. It’s things like Ronan eating a good lunch, looking at me and saying, “I made a mess mom. Sorry. I love you.” It’s the Ronan that is outside playing baseball and whacking the ball so far that I have to chase it out to the end of the yard. It is the Ronan who wants to wrestle and light saber fight with me. He is still the same Ronan, the love of my life. He loves me too much to leave me. He loves his friends and family too much. He is not going anywhere. I know this, I believe this, I can see it in his eyes.

This morning I had lots of visitors. A friend of mine, Jaye, stopped by just for a minute to give me a hug and drop off some treats. I have not seen her in a few years and I am sorry for that. It is so easy to get caught up in day-to-day things, and before you know it it’s been 3 years since you’ve seen a good friend. I will never let that happen again. I’ve learned this lesson now, because of all of this. Life is too short to let friendships slip away. People are meant to be in your life for a reason.. and seeing Jaye today reminded me of that.

Niki, Heidi, and Lauren also stopped by all at the same time as they had just come from preschool. They came bearing coffee and brought a lot of smiles to Ronan. He didn’t even run and hide in my room! He stayed in the living room with us while we talked and he shot Niki with some darts. He giggled a lot which is the sweetest sound in the world.

So today, I feel strong. Stronger than I have in a long time. A lot of that has to do with the support and love we have surrounding us and the strength I see from Ronan. He is my little fighter and I know he won’t give up. He loves us way too much for that.

6 thoughts on “Stronger than yesterday”

  1. Hi…

    I went to school with Woody many, many years ago- and I’m sure he probably doesn’t even remember me. I just want you and your family to know that you are a beautiful writer, and I read (and cry with) every one of your posts.

    Ronan is an absolute doll, and you are so lucky to have such a wonderful, loving family- and to have such an amazing, supportive group of friends.

    Know that there is a family in Kansas City that thinks of you guys daily, and believes 100% that you will win this battle.

    Squeeze your kids a little extra for us today. 🙂

    ~hayley lewis

  2. When you and Ronan are happy, we are all happy. Remember this day and this strength as this is what will get you through. Before you know it Ronan will be in a t-ball league with his friends and you and your family and friends will be watching and cheering him on just like now. Everything comes full circle my friend.

  3. Hi Maya,
    I’m a friend of Woody’s from back at ASU (we were in Advocates & ASASU together). I just wanted reach out to let you know that I have all of Seattle praying for you and your beautiful family. You are doing such an incredible job mothering and loving- its so evident in your posts! Sending you strengh & all of my positive thoughts! Go Ronan!!!

  4. Just another note to say that even though we may not comment after every amazing/beautiful/heart-wrenching/funny/loving/powerful post…your family is thought of and prayed for by us all of the time.

  5. Hi Thompson family~ I have been following your website after a mutual friend (Gay) shared it with me (another connection…Bob and Woody were Sigma Chi’s together back in the day 🙂 You have been on our minds and heart ever since we learned about Ronan. Maya, your writings are truly inspiring…you come from such an honest, heartfelt place and we are humbled to be able to share in your journey. Know that we truly are praying for you; for complete healing for Ronan and for a knowing that God is carrying you through this difficult time. From what i’ve learned about Ronan through your writings, he truly is a rockstar and he has rockstar parents and brothers who will continue to pull him through this!! With love, Michelle and Bob

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