Sorry I didn’t get to post last night. I left the boys with Woody in the main room and went into my bedroom at 8:00, shut all the doors, turned off my phone, and fell asleep. It felt so nice to just kind of close out the world for that moment. Woody put Ronan in bed with me around 9:30 and he slept in Quinn’s bed. Poor Daddy Woo. Sleeping with him at night is one of the things that I miss the most. Night time used to be our time together. It was our time at the end of our busy days to catch up, reflect, laugh, and just be together. We are making the best of our situation though…stealing moments here and there… wherever we can.
Yesterday, Quinn threw up at school. I got a call from the nurse and Mimi Kay went off and running to pick him up. So glad for her, but was sad that I couldn’t even go pick up my baby. He couldn’t even come home. I just set out new clothes on the porch for him and he went to Mimi and Papa’s house for the night. I hate that I can’t be the one taking care of him. Mimi said he slept for a long time and she made him her delicious chicken noodle soup and he watched some football with Papa and went back to sleep around 9. He stayed home today (at Mim’s house) and was still asleep when she left to come here to pick up Liam this morning for school. I hope he feels better today and it was just a 24 hour thing. The big boys’ have their first basketball practice tonight at The Village. I know Quinn was excited for it so I hope he is able to go.
I talked to my friend, Sandy, last night for a bit. Was nice to hear her voice. We’ve been friends since we were about 5. She is my oldest and dearest. I know it’s hard for her to not be here helping me but she is helping me even though she is not aware of it. It is nice just to hear her voice and to hear her say how proud she is of me and she had no idea I was this strong of a person. She asked me if I ever just get to forget about this for even a minute. I thought about it and told her no… not ever. Even when I sleep all I do is dream about Ronan and his cancer. Sometimes I dream that I have it instead of him. I so wish that were the case.
I have a busy Wednesday full of taking care of Ro and doing things around the house. I am calling a Naturopathic doctor today to see what we can be doing for Ronan in between chemo treatments. I know I’ll have to get everything approved through Phoenix Children’s, I’ve already talked to Dr. Wood about it and he said that it was fine. I have to be doing everything and anything to get Ronan better. Naturopathic treatments can’t hurt. Have a good Wednesday!!!