You make beautiful things happen


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Ronan. You make beautiful things happen and last night was proof of that. Taylor Swift was in town for the Red Tour. We were invited to go as a family and could have not been more excited. Last minute plans were made, plans were changed, plans were made again. Brianna was in town staying with us and Macy had just left after being here for almost a week. The time with Macy here or as Poppy is going to call her, “Auntie M,” was so special. I watched Macy fall head over heels in love with your sister the same way she did with you. We did a lot of nothing except live in Poppy world. We celebrated your Daddy’s birthday which was a hard day, but as always, we just go through it the best we could. Tears were shed, but for the most part we tried to make it a fun evening by having some dear friends over. We all just mostly sat around and cooed over your sister. She truly does make many days better, but days like special occasions are still pretty hard. Macy knew this and just sat and played with my hair while I rocked your sister and the tears fell silently to the ground. She just looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, “I know.” She knew what I was thinking, as she always does. How I wished so badly you were there with us to celebrate your wonderful daddy. How I wish every day you were with us to not celebrate a thing, but to just live this life with us that was so unfairly taken away from you. I will never stop wishing this.

It’s taken me a few days to figure out why I am having such a hard time writing this post. I’ll start by saying two years ago when I was first invited to meet Taylor and go to her concert, I was in a completely different place than I am now. 2 years ago I remember trying to get ready for her concert and how I could hardly peel myself up off the floor to go. I was destroyed back then and wasn’t so sure I’d be around to survive this life much longer without you. I was in such a sad place that I didn’t think I deserved to go to a concert, meet this amazing girl or feel any sort of happiness at all. I went because I had a message to share, because of my manners, and I knew how rude it would be not to go after I was so kindly invited. Little did I know that Taylor already knew all about you and our hauntingly sad love story. She already knew the message I was wanting to share and welcomed it with open arms. Fast forward 2 years later and I am now in a very different place.

I spent the day with Liam, Quinn, and Bri Bri, hanging out and getting ready for the concert. I felt excited and happy, and as always, a little sad, too. I knew Taylor was going to be meeting your Poppy sister and for me, that was the best part of everything. To me, it was like she was going to get to meet a little piece of you and I can’t even put into words how much that meant. We as a family, all went to the concert. We ended up splitting up as your daddy, Liam, and Poppy sat backstage with Taylor’s dad for most of the show. Even though we had protective ear coverings for Poppy, it still made me nervous to have her out in the loud arena with everyone. Your daddy was whisked away by Taylor’s lovely assistant and taken back stage where all was safe and sound. Liam went with your daddy also, as the concert was a little too loud for him. He’s never been a fan of anything too loud and crazy. I stayed down at our seats with Bri, Quinn and your Sparkly. There was a lot of dancing, singing, laughing, and maybe a little crying. I sat back and watched the most amazing performance and was of course blown away by the talent before me. She always manages to out do herself that Taylor girl. I felt so blessed to be a part of it. It was a night where I got a chance to put my pain on hold for a few hours and just get lost in the magic and beauty before me. Between Taylor’s beautiful voice, the smile on Quinn’s face, and the insane dancing that I did with Brianna when Taylor sang, “22,” everything about the night was perfect. Almost freaking perfect. You know the one little thing missing was of course you. I tried my best to remind myself that you were there with us, somewhere. Even though I couldn’t see you, I know you were there and I let that be o.k. for a few hours.

After the concert we got to spend a lot of time with Taylor and her dad in the most intimate setting. I’ve now realized why it is that I’ve had such a hard time with this post. It’s because of the way this relationship with Taylor has changed and evolved. It’s because I feel insanely protective of her and the way she’s opened up her heart to us. People try to exploit this girl all day long and I’m just not going to do that. I won’t do that. I’ve felt that way since day one of meeting her, but my protectiveness has only grown over time. I’ve had all of these news stations calling me, wanting to do interviews about Taylor’s concert, what it’s like to have her here in the Valley, wanting to know if she was going to sing, “Ronan,”etc… I politely declined doing any of them. It almost felt yucky to me. To me, the time we spent with Taylor was so sacred and special that I would just like to keep most of it between us and our family. At one point during our time together as I watched her holding Poppy, I asked her a certain question. She looked at me to answer it and said, “I hope I made the right call.” I told her as my eyes filled up with tears that I believed she did. I hope tonight, with this post, I made the right call, too. I don’t mind sharing most of the night, but not all of it. Some things just feel too sacred to be shared. This girl feels like a part of our family now, not some big celebrity. It’s funny because she’s never felt like some big celebrity to me. To me she’s always just felt like a normal girl who fell in love with you and who just happened to be in a position to make something really beautiful happen because she took a chance on us and followed her heart. To me, that has saved me in a way and I will forever be grateful to her and her old, wise soul. I have no doubt that many more beautiful things are to come.

As far as me not wanting to share much about our night, I hope you all understand. To me, the picture below explains everything.

I love you, Ronan. I miss you. I love you. I hope you are safe. Sweet dreams, little man.

xoxo

P.S. Taylor, Thank you for EVERYTHING. You know I have 50 million things I want to say to you, but all I’m going to say is you my friend, could give Hallmark a run for their money. I love you so much.

photo 2

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43 Comments

  1. Honestly, I’m more curious (and DETERMINED) to find out who Mr Sparkly Eyes is than what happened with Taylor hahaha love the way you carry yourself with such dignity and the respect you show for Taylor and her privacy. You two will make big things happen xo

    Reply
  2. Taylor is such an Angel :)
    Ang Poppy is the luckiest baby in the whole wide world!

    Reply
  3. Though I didn’t think this was possible at this point, I just gained even more respect for you, Maya. So many people would be shouting from the rooftops about their time with Taylor and get anything they could from her. You, of course, don’t roll that way and that shows so mych about your character. I am so proud for how far you have come since that first concert. You and Ro never cease to amaze me

    Reply
  4. Maya,
    The love and respect you two have for one another is beyond words. I love the protective “big sister” love you have for Taylor, I totally understand why…. I also get so tired of the media hounding and dogging such a sweet young lady…they suck….she ROCKS and so do you…..and Poppy….all your boys everything about you and yours…….purely beautiful!!……Thank you for sharing with us. Thank you for not sharing other things that are just “yours” I admire that!…..so very much.

    Reply
  5. alina914

     /  June 1, 2013

    Maya Thompson, you are an absolute inspiration and I have started running because of you. That picture of Taylor holding Poppy is so precious, she looks an angel, and Poppy’s flower (poppy?) head band is adorable. Love the name Poppy so much.

    Reply
  6. I have loved Taylor Swift since the very first time I heard her. She was at the Lexington BBQ festival in North Carolina. She was 16 years old singing the time McGraw song. I knew then that she was special. But when I heard her singing Ronan at the s⬆2c concert a new kind of love bloomed in my heart for her. She has such a beautiful and loving soul just like you Maya. I believe you two were meant to be in each others lives. I am so touched by your story and your relationship with Taylor, it helps me have faith in humanity. I love you Maya. I love you Taylor. I love you Poppy. I love you Ronan.

    Reply
  7. I admire you for not sharing the details. I am dedicated to helping find a cure for cancer that took your beautiful Ro………keep those moments with Taylor and your family private! XO

    Reply
  8. Dear Maya, we all understand the reason why you couldn’t (and also shouldn’t) share that much with us tonight and you are completely right, what you had there was truly magical and I know Ronan was right there by your side, feeling everything good that you felt and I’m also sure he shares that special bound with that nice young lady called Taylor Swift. You shouldn’t feel sorry to feel joy or to have fun, I know Ronan would like you too, that’s why he sent Poppy to your family. Love and prays from Brazil, may your heart be a little less heavy everyday :)

    Reply
  9. Dear Maya,
    You are simply amazing! I have no words to help me explain how awesome you and your family are for the fight you’re fighting and the respect you have for Taylor. The night Taylor sang “Ronan” I immediately wanted to know about his story. I was touched and have been hooked on reading your blog ever since. I wish you would do some sort of walk over here on the East coast that I could be a part of and help raise awareness and money for Ronan!
    Btw Poppy is the most adorable baby I have EVER seen!
    Love one of your biggest fans,
    Tracy
    RoLove, PoppyLove forever <33

    Reply
  10. Maya,
    I have always felt that I never really knew how to love until I became a mom. The fierce love that comes through in your words is infectious. I know that love you have comes not only from your sweet and spicy Ronan, but from all of your beautiful family. When I read your blog, I feel like i can change the world! You have a gift. I know this is not the way you would have wanted to share it, but you and your RoLovies are changing people’s hearts and minds. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with millions of people. xoxo

    Reply
  11. RoMama,
    I was there on Tuesday and meet Ronan’s Angel Kassie. 💜

    Love Taylor!
    That’s Romazing that Mr. sparklyeyes went to the concert.

    Maya, you carry yourself with class! You, Ronan & Taylor will do big things for childhodd cancer and stay humble. No need to shout it from the rooftops. Your followers (Maya’s mafia) will be here to support you and have your back.

    I can’t believe the asspoleinronansvoice bully. Grow up people. If they don’t like what you write in your lovestory to Ronan…step away and go somewhere else. Bs!!!

    Rolove mama
    Always rolove
    Fuck you cancer!!!
    XO

    Reply
  12. Maya, It is so reassuring to learn about the goodness of people in this world, when so much focus is placed on the sensational, the culture of celebrity, and tearing people down. You are a gift, Maya. Your path of suffering, your honest openness, your toughness, your weakness, your humanness, your clear prose, your true heart, your blatant fuck yous to cancer, your willingness to be yourself, and protect those most dear to you…are all national treasures. I am not kidding. Thank you for sharing what you need to, sitting down at your computer to write with sweet Poppy in your lap, for all of your devotion to battling childhood cancer, for being an exceptional mother, wife, writer. You know that when you write about Ronan, a part of him is still here. You are a part of him, he is part of you, and you let us into your life, and have forever changed it. You are a gem. Keep up the vital work. Cannot wait to read your book (which I will buy and give to everyone I love.) Sending you tremendous love, Kirsten Casey

    Reply
  13. MAYA,you are extraordinary. I read something today and instantly thought of you. “Some people are not meant to be happy. They are meant to be great.” I read how the people who do the greatest things on earth often have to face the greatest hardships. Mama Maya, you’re destined to be extraordinary. Everyone in your life, is so lucky to have you.

    Reply
  14. This post absolutely touched my heart! Your words are so warm.

    Thank you for so much sharing.

    Reply
  15. Taylor is so lucky to be a part of your family now! I am so very proud of you for being her protecter, Ro is proud too I am sure.
    You always touch my heart, but this post really shows your heart!

    Reply
  16. hello there maya. :)
    im so happy you’re okay. and that pic of Taylor and Poppy is adorable.
    Taylor swift was beyond amazing. She has such a big heart. and the world just needs more people like her. :) She’s an inspiration to many. I’m not sure if you read this or anything, but i’d just like to say, that reading your blog has made me realize a lot of things. A lot of things that i haven’t realized before… this world is a cruel world. but we need to keep our chin up and fight. because if we didn’t, this world would eat us alive..We pull ourselves up, and keep fighting. Why? Because its better to have died trying, than to have not.

    – maybe my words won’t help you. But i will speak them anyway…Just incase they do. ;)

    Reply
  17. btw, its gunna be awesome in about 10 years from now when you tell poppy that she was actually held by none other than taylor swift. :D

    Reply
  18. The photo of Taylor holding Poppy is extraordinarily beautiful. Thank you for sharing. Ronan, you continue to do wonderful things for the whole world. You will always be loved and missed.

    Reply
  19. I am touched by this.

    Reply
  20. You are in such a different place than you were 2 years ago. Time does strange things to grief (but it does not heal – at least not in my experience with the deaths of my sons).

    Ronan is still gone and you still miss him. As you have written, you could have stayed on the floor but you not only did get up but you have made the world a better place. You, Ronan and Taylor are amazing. FU CANCER!!

    Reply
  21. Mary Duggan

     /  June 1, 2013

    Maya, what a lovely post. You did exactly the right thing in keeping your private time with Taylor private. You are both artists with a deep and loving bond. Your relationship is not a media event. Sharing the photo was the best ever and so very generous. I hope the night was another step in your ongoing healing. I know it was another chapter in your I am sure lifelong friendship with Taylor. Blessings from the Duggan Sisters

    Reply
  22. I also meant to write that I am so glad for you that May is over. And, the picture or Poppy meeting Taylor is fantastic. xo

    Reply
  23. I love Taylor Swift. I hate when people follow her to knock her down… I love that she is so confident and lovely and real. She can sing about every emotion and she is so young… she captures a feeling that I understand in your Ronan’s song… she seems to young to capture that… but she does. I am glad you had a night like that… I am glad Taylor met your Poppy… <3

    Reply
  24. I am amazed at how much of an incredible person you are! You have such a powerful presence, even just through your words. I think you are so sweet how you just want to protect Taylor, even though you could spread Ronan’s cause and help others out there. Taylor has done wonderful things – especially for you and your family, even more so for Ronan. It really breaks my heart that Ronan isn’t here to meet Poppy and be her big brother and teach her the ropes in life. I can’t imagine how you feel – what a fucking awful thing to have to try to deal with.. He will guide her in life, I truly believe that. I hope Poppy is still doing good, she really is the spitting image of Ronan – what a lucky girl!
    -Kelly

    Reply
  25. I found your story through another friend and I was up all night reading your story. My son just turned 2 and he was diagnosed with Neuroblastoma in February. Your story has touched me in so many ways! My love goes out to you and Ronan.

    Reply
  26. Beautiful photo of Taylor and Poppy. Never feel bad about not sharing some things. I never share on my blog things that I feel I don’t want to share or everyone to know. There are just some things that are better left unsaid. We never can make everyone happy. But those that don’t matter are the only ones upset. Those that do matter are glad the moments are kept as precious and private. Besides… The photo says all you needed to. Taylor is a person who cares and is full of love! I’m glad you danced like crazy for the song 22. I would have too. We dance and sing to just about all her songs. My daughter and I sing them all the time. Colt pretends to not like her at times… But we catch him singing them too. :-) Kodiak feels the joy.
    Thank you Taylor and Thompson for beautiful photo. :-)

    Reply
  27. Opps I meant Thompson family… Sorry bad typo on iPhone. Very sorry!

    Reply
  28. This post brings me happiness! Love the Poppy and Taylor pictures!

    Reply
  29. lauriefromfrance

     /  June 2, 2013

    This is what happend when two golden hearts meet each other!! A gold post !
    I am extremely curious about this night…but I prefer to never know.
    This is your secret. Keep it safe.
    This picture means everything for Rolovi’s <3

    Reply
  30. You own your life and your stories. Never feel bad about that. I am glad you all had a good time!

    Reply
  31. Jordyn pace

     /  June 2, 2013

    Wow. That’s all Ive got to say. Maya, speaking from a thirteen year olds point of view, I cannot tell you how proud I am of you. You inspired me to create a small organization of kids that follow your story and do fundraisers to donate to your organization. So far we have raised 50 dollars. We also bought bracelets, and are giving them out to our entire town. You are an inspiring woman, and a strong one as well. I totally understand that you don’t want to share your time with Taylor. I also understand how you don’t want to have Taylor represent your orGanization. You cherish your time with her. Anyway, love ya Ro. Your making such a big difference down here, and I am so proud of you.

    Spread the RoLove!!
    JPace

    Reply
  32. Daniella

     /  June 3, 2013

    Oh Maya. You are such a mama through and through. Protective, honest, loving – how lucky Liam, Quinn, Ronan and Poppy are to have you as a mama. And then Taylor, and all your extended little lovies and readers – we are all lucky and greatful for you. I’m so happy to hear that you were really able to enjoy the concert. What a journey is has been and a ride it will continue to be. I’m so sorry that Ronan wasn’t there is the way he should be – it’s truely tragic. Sending you love from Seattle – Daniella

    Reply
  33. Bobbie

     /  June 3, 2013

    Maya, You are definitely a beautiful soul and so it Taylor. I’m sure that is why Ro has made sure the two of you have connected in more ways that one. Thanks for sharing what you did, it was just enough! That picture of Taylor and Poppy is just angelic.

    Reply
  34. So beautiful. You, Woody, Taylor, Poppy, Ronan, Liam, and Quinn. xo

    Reply
  35. fletcher

     /  June 3, 2013

    I remember thinking of this quote when Taylor first appeared on your blog, but now more than ever it reminds me of her:

    “The younger lady was in the lovely bloom and spring-time of womanhood; at that age, when, if ever angels be for God’s good purposes enthroned in mortal forms, they may be, without impiety, supposed to abide in such as hers.

    She was not past seventeen. Cast in so slight and exquisite a mould; so mild and gentle; so pure and beautiful; that earth seemed not her element, nor its rough creatures her fit companions. The very intelligence that shone in her deep blue eye, and was stamped upon her noble head, seemed scarcely of her age, or of the world; and yet the changing expression of sweetness and good humour, the thousand lights that played about the face, and left no shadow there; above all, the smile, the cheerful, happy smile, were made for Home, and fireside peace and happiness.

    She was busily engaged in the little offices of the table. Chancing to raise her eyes as the elder lady was regarding her, she playfully put back her hair, which was simply braided on her forehead; and threw into her beaming look, such an expression of affection and artless loveliness, that blessed spirits might have smiled to look upon her.”

    -Oliver Twist, Charles Dickens

    Reply
  36. Casie

     /  June 4, 2013

    You are honest, caring, respectful and beautiful. You deserve privacy and something as special as this relationship should be yours and yours alone :) Sending you love from WA !

    Reply
  37. mary Alati

     /  June 4, 2013

    Hi Maya,
    My daughter and I were at the same concert as you. All we could think about was you and Ronan and what a beuatiful story you have to tell. A sad tragic story. My daughter lost her best friend Zac to wilms tumor 4 years ago and he was this full of life little blond boy. We feel through the song we can strongly relate.,I cry every time I read your post but I cant get enough you my dear are an amazing lady and you have such an amazing family. We just wanted to say hello and that we will forever have Ronan in our hearts.
    Sincerely Mary and Bella Alati

    Reply
  38. Catie Sain

     /  June 5, 2013

    It’s truly heartbreaking to see all of the many many souls yanked away from those with the greatest desire. This story and all those like it deserve to be broadcast everywhere. Give these families hope, give her little boys hope.Maya, I think of you and your family everyday and especially the missing piece. He helps me live everyday like a rockstar, helping others and being a better, more caring human being. His bright blue eyes break my heart everytime i look down at my phone and see him staring right back. I will always support you and I will do my very best to help in every way possible.

    Reply
  39. Amy

     /  June 6, 2013

    This picture is amazing! It shows just how big her heart is. She wrote Ronan but then didn’t just forget about you, Woody, Liam, or Quinn. You guys are family, forever & always (true swiftie here :) )

    Reply
  40. Emma

     /  June 7, 2013

    I love you so much Ronan, thank you for everything, and thank you for what you do every single day in my life ! I’m proud of you and I’m so happy to “met” you. Sorry baby boy if you suffer, sorry for that cancer and that life. Thanks for Poppy !!!
    Maya thank you for sharing your baby boy life. We love thompson family so much. you are changing the world !

    FU cancer, Ronan win the battle. I hate you

    Reply
  41. I’ve liked Taylor since the moment she hit the scene, but the kindness and compassion she has shown you and your family has made me love her. I feel protective over her too! She is such a wonderful person, and a real rarity in her industry.

    Reply
  42. I love this post and your whole story. The picture with Taylor is great and I love that Poppy is wearing a Red headband!

    Reply
  43. Maya, you never fail to make me well up when I read your blog posts. I love you, and I love Ronan. Sorry for not saying much, I just never know what to say with things like this. You’ve inspired me so much, and that’s all I can say. I love you, your beautiful family and your story, and your strength x

    Reply

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  • Instagram is my BFF

    This is the "I want to fucking kill myself selfie." Camelback Inferno hike today is extra hot. WTF was I thinking? Oh, I know. My son died from fucking cancer so I get to live my life being insane and doing crazy shit like this because sometimes it's the only thing that makes me feel alive. Thanks, cancer. You are an asshole. #ronan #fucancer #camelbackmountain #infernohiking #iwanttofuckingkillmyselfselfie #thatwasajoke #nobodyneedstofreakout Battle of the Blogs ends at 11:59PM MST TONIGHT! Those last few hours are invaluable, so please continue to vote as often as you can. 💜

Thank you for your love, your support, your kindness, and your belief in Maya & Ronan, and how they're changing the world. Link is on FB & Twitter! Read this little gem thanks to @rainesfordalexandra today. Amazing on so many levels. George Saunder's graduation speech. Google it. Read it. Absorb it. Grow from it. Live it. Love it. Strive to be better. Don't become a sociopath. #ronan #fucancer #bestgraduationspeechever #georgesaunders #beautifulwords #kindness #braveness #love
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