Hi. It’s me. Do you know what’s going to happen after I put this book out into the world? I will finally be free of this extra layer of pain I’ve been carrying around on top of my grief because I can talk openly about all the trauma and bullshit I endured. I’m in the trenches right now. Thank you all for being so patient and so supportive. Here is a little snippet below.

“I was fine with being the “crazy” one—the wildcard who had become so unhinged over the death of her child. I wasn’t fine with being in an environment where I didn’t feel safe or genuinely supported. I had grown tired of the victim mentality games. The passive-aggressive gestures. The love that came with conditions. The judgment of my grief and how I was living my life. The jealousy over my other relationships with people I considered to be my family. I had played the role of “Sweet Maya” my entire marriage because things inside our family of five felt easy. We didn’t have drama, and the red flags I saw in _________were easy to ignore because my inner child was thankful there wasn’t any physical violence. In losing Ronan, I lost everything, including my ability to look the other way at things that felt wrong.

rockstarronan

April 6, 2023

4 responses to “Hi. It’s me. Do you know what’s going to happen after I put this book out into the world? I will finally be free of this extra layer of pain I’ve been carrying around on top of my grief because I can talk openly about all the trauma and bullshit I endured. I’m in the trenches right now. Thank you all for being so patient and so supportive. Here is a little snippet below.”

Duffy

April 6, 2023 at 9:25 pm

This is so moving, and so relatable…even from outside of the terrible world of losing a child. I lost my mom…my best friend, and I was suddenly unable to continue living life in the comfortable lies and excuses that my world was built on. You never cease to amaze me, Maya. Although I don’t personally know the depth of your loss, your incredible talent for putting words on paper makes it so easy to relate to you. I am so incredibly grateful to have found your blog, and I CANNOT wait to read your book. Much love, as always ❤️

Reply
Kristina Salinas

April 6, 2023 at 10:03 pm

Your raw emotion and transparency is what most of us have been patiently waiting on. Only you have lived and can tell your truth. Your strength is amazing.

Kristina

Reply
Sherry Bucalo

April 7, 2023 at 8:57 pm

Sometimes the worst thing that happens to you, becomes the very thing that makes you understand that settling doesn’t work and that you deserve so much more than that because what can they possibly do to you because you’ve already been to hell. I can not even imagine your pain, but your words give me hope, hope for you and all of the people like you, who have been to hell and back and refuse to settle anymore. You do you because you are one hell of a person and if people don’t see that it is their loss not yours. Seriously can not wait for your book and I think it should be required reading for most all of us. Hang in there!!!

Reply
Sumaira McCloud

April 9, 2023 at 10:51 am

I’m excited to read your truth! I’ve always loved your writing style. Raw, open, unapologetic, intelligent. Sending you all my love! Btw, since I last read (10 years ago) and actively followed I have become a mom myself and I want you to know how very often I think of you and your Ronan. Your blog changed my entire life years ago. I told SO many ppl about it. And, as an always Taylor Swift fan, it made me respect her so deeply for what she was able to do for you during that horrific time. When ppl asked for donations, anywhere, any time I saw neuro-blastoma I instantly thought of you and Ro and chose that one to donate to! I hope you know your blog and truth matters, and it has touched SO many of us in so many ways.

Reply