My friend, Sandra, is one bad-ass MoFo <3

I’m dedicating my post to my new hero tonight, Sandra Foutz. I’ve talked about her little girl, Mia, several times on my blog. She is fighting brain cancer and I met her husband at PCH when he ran me down because he recognized Ronan from this blog. I’ve become good friends with Matt and Sandra; they are an amazing family. When this all happened to Ronan, I begged Woody to let me shave my head. I begged Liam and Quinn and ultimately I didn’t do it, because just talking about it to the twins upset them. I had to make the right call… they are 7 and are scared enough. They are just now starting to pick up on the whole being different thing and I guess a mommy with a shaved head was too much for them. I respected that, but my inner badass so wanted to do it. I did not; but Sandra did. Her husband, Matt just sent me a picture of her and I started bawling. She looks so beautiful and I can see the strength in her eyes. Sandra, you are amazing and Mia is so lucky to have you as her mom. I am going to keep this picture of you on my phone and look at it every time I am feeling weak and sorry for myself. You are my hero and I love you.

Ronan’s ANC counts jumped from 30 yesterday, to 200 today. That is great news and looks like we are getting out of here tomorrow. Keeping my fingers crossed… they want his ANC at 250 before we can leave and I am expecting that Ronan’s counts will be much higher tomorrow. I guess we were meant to be here this week. Ronan had another bloody nose and I spent from 7 this morning until about 10 a.m. pinching it. They transfused him again with platelets and that got it to stop. I ran home to shower and rest a little bit. Mimi stayed with Ronan for me. My friend, Niki, came and took me out into the world today to run errands. It was a good thing; I really needed her company. We ran into A.J.’s for a couple of things…. I about had a breakdown in there. I couldn’t focus on what I needed to get, felt like I was in a fog, and couldn’t think straight. I think I scared Niki…. it’s hard for her to watch me struggle. That’s how big her heart is. She was patient with me and helped me through it. We also ran to get pedicures together which was such a treat. I’m going to miss her so much when I’m gone:( I’m going to miss a lot of people. I’m looking at New York as though I am there to do a job. I know when we get there I will be o.k. I will be focused, determined, and strong. There is no time for being weak; it’s show time and it’s time to get this tumor out of my baby.

I am trying not to worry about our plane situation too much. I am leaving it in Woody’s hands and I have faith that things will fall into place. Woody is supposed to call Mr. W tomorrow to let him know we have the green light on being discharged, for sure. Praying that it all works out. I was having so much anxiety here tonight that I spent an hour and a half organizing our little room, disinfecting anything I could… even the floors, bed, and couch. You know you’re going crazy when doing things like that calms you. It is the only thing that gives me a feeling of control. I felt an instant sense of calm and relief when I was finished. Ronan sat and helped me and cleaned all of  his Star Wars guys. Then he insisted on throwing them all across the room for me for 30 minutes and basically played fetch with me because he is all hooked up and cannot get them himself. The things we do as mom’s:) I was happy to do it for him though; anything to make the time pass by a little more quickly. Ronan spent the rest of the  night tonight up to all of his old tricks. Bouncing off the walls, causing trouble, being sassy… all which tells me he is feeling great. One of his favorite nurses, Arica, was here and he spent a lot of the night giggling and laughing with her. She is sooooo great with him and he adores her. I am going to miss the nurses here so much. They are angels and I have such respect for the job they do; it is such a hard one but they do it so well. We are going to miss our favorite male nurse too, Danny. Love him. He is really great with Ronan. We will be excited to get back to them in January.

I’m am going to try and cuddle up with my little bug; despite the loudness of our room tonight. Oh, what I wouldn’t give for a private room! G’nite to you all. Please keep us all in your thoughts and prayers so we can get this show on the road and get to NYC already! Hugs and kisses to you all.

P.S. A very Happy Birthday wish to my dearest, sweetest, dolly, LIZ!! Happy 21st my LOVE! I hope you had a beautiful birthday and can’t wait to spend time with you in NYC!!

And P.P.S. To my new NYC friend, Macy!! I can’t wait to meet you. Thanks for being so helpful and sweet, even though we are strangers! So glad you reached out to me on here and so glad to have a friend in New York. Love it even more that you are an Alumni Sundevil! Our friendship was so meant to be!