I’m not sure how much I’ll be able to write tonight. My husband says he does not have a wife anymore… he has a blogger. He needs me to spend some time with him. I will just say that today we had a great day. My mom is here and I know that I made the right decision on making her wait to come out and see us. She is stronger now and Ronan is stronger as well. Having her here is the perfect timing. She gets to see her sweet baby grandchild while he is feeling great. That is exactly what I wanted. I took Ronan out for his first time in 7 weeks. We went to Yogurtland and sat outside with Liam, Quinn, my mom, Gay, Chet, and Cal (Liam and Quinn’s buddies) Ronan was practically glowing. He was so happy to be out and with his brothers and friends. We sat outside on this beautiful AZ night and the boys played and giggled. I’m going to talk to the doctors tomorrow about Ronan being around other kids. Taking his childhood away from him is just not fair. He needs to be around other kids. Of course I had out the hand sanitizer every 5 minutes, but that’s o.k. At least he was out:) It was exactly what he needed.
My friend, Charisma, got back from Toronto today. She sent me a really beautiful email about her experience and I wanted to share. Instead of blogging a bunch tonight, I thought I would share a couple of things. Here is a little bit of what Charisma experienced.
I thought this trip to fundraise would be so heart breaking and sad- which was ok, I was ready for it. But you’re never ready to see kids fight so hard for their right to live. However, they inspired me so much!
A Dr. spoke at the gala dinner last night. He’s a Doctor from “Sickkids Hospital” in Toronto.
He said fund-raising equals life. (- whoa! ) He also said, “There is a cure.” There are new drugs out there to develop that can trick cancer cells from multiplying by getting the cancer cell to kill itself. 5 of his former patients are either; in residency, the lab or med school. By the time these kids finish school, there will be a cure. “This time” he said, ” it’s personal”
The beauty of the story is, kids weren’t surviving before. In the 80′s (?)there was a 5 percent survival rate for pediatric cancer patients. Now its 80 percent due to funding and awareness. There is HOPE! A little girl shared her story her survival of cancer. She said when my grandpa was in med school and if I had been diagnosed then, I would have died. But now, I live to see another day. ( Her grandpa discovered her illness) uh! So brave! So clear , so inspiring. And she’s not even 13 yet.
I know Ronan will make it! I just am sure of it. He will win and he will have changed lives by just being him. A fighter! A spunky little man with just the right amount of angel to stare cancer down!
I talk about Ronan to everyone I can. I talk about his bright eyes. I was on the plane home with Robin Antin from the Pussy Cat Dolls I told her to tweet about you and send her peeps to your blog. Hopefully she’ll do it. Other pediatric cancer patients are lucky a child with such a face has cancer. Unfortunately or fortunately, he will motivate more people to do more and give more because of his good looks. -And that’s ok. Its more meaningful to be the poster child for pediatric Cancer than the Gap. Yes? ( Not that you asked for that, Maya. No one wants their kid to be ill. – I hope you can see the silver lining in what I’m trying to articulate, a bit poorly.)
None the less, I read your blog every day, every post. I want to buy a Tee! A few! Do you have any left?
That’s all. Love to you!
Charisma is inspired, and moved, and is getting her wake up call in life. She now knows helping with childhood cancer awareness is something that she is going to be part of, for the rest of her life. She knows this because she looks at her beautiful little boy, Donovan, and knows it can happen to anyone. There needs to be more funding, more hope, and a cure. Charisma loves Ronan and loves us and is part of our army of angels. I know she hugs Donovan a little more tightly at night and I am so glad I can give her that gift. Even through all of my pain, it is worth it to me.
My last little thought is a comment on my blog that brought me to tears tonight. It’s from somebody that I don’t even know, but it really moved me. I would like to share that as well. Here it is below:
I have always been a believer that everything happens for a reason-no matter how small and seemingly insignificant-and that eventually the meanings for your actions become clear. That being said, the other day while in line at the grocery store, I picked up a copy of Us Weekly. While skimming I read that Tori Spelling had set up a Twitter account for her son and ended up adding him, Tori and then Denise Richards on Twitter.(I promise this is all relevant.) I do not read “Trashmags” and I log on to Twitter every once in a blue moon, so I really do believe this is special. Moments after I added Demise she tweeted something about 20k reason why and a link. I was intrigued and opened to find a fan page to get Oprah to do a show on Childhood Cancer. I began reading posts and looking at pictures of children who had lot their fight and whose parents simply wanted them to be “seen.” I fell asleep crying and in the rush of the past two days, completely forgot about it…
Today I went looking for my mothers blog, and happened onto the wrong one. It was one about mothers being better mothers before they were mothers. I skimmed and scrolled down to the comments where I saw a comment that said, “If you want to learn a thing or two about being a mother, read this blog.” I clicked through to find a beautiful little boy staring back at me-your army boy Ronan. I sat for about 2 hours and read this blog from start to today. I cried happy tears and sad tears and I laughed and sighed and felt your pain. In 2 hours I felt like I knew you, Ronan, Woody, Quinn, Liam, Mimi Kay, Lindsey, Winston, everyone. I was transferred into your heartbreaking and miraculous world. I would just like you to know that I am here. Both with you and for you and don’t hesitate to email if you just need to vent. I live on the East Coast, in CT. But I hope someday I will be able to meet you and your beautiful little fighter.
Love, hugs and prayers,
So, Cassidy… I just wanted to say thank you for this. Your email really touched me. It gives me strength to see that good things are coming from this heartbreaking journey we are on. It brings me joy to know that Ronan’s story is making a difference in people’s lives. He is the most special little boy and is going to win this fight for all of the other kids out there. He is strong enough to take this on and give others hope in their darkest hours. I, as his mother am his biggest advocate, and he inspires me everyday. He inspires me to work harder, be kinder, love stronger, and never give up. It is through his eyes that I see our battle being won. He is worth every ounce of blood, sweat and tears that comes from this. I will never give up hope and I will never stop fighting for all the children that also have to endure this kind of pain. If anything, I just want the people reading our journey to be the best parents they can possibly be to their kids. A child is the most precious thing on earth and if you are lucky enough to have kids who are healthy… please don’t ever take that for granted. You have no idea how lucky you are.
That is all tonight. My husband is giving me the death stare Goodnight and sweet dreams to you all!!!