I saw a glimmer of hope tonight…. and I’m running with it.


So last night was rough. After a 2 hour meeting with our oncologist, Dr. Wood; Woody (talk about a sign, Dr. Wood and my husband, Woody:)) and I were completely overwhelmed and had no idea where to turn. We were basically given 2 options for Ronan’s treatments and had only heard the opinions of our one oncologist here (who is amazing) and his “team.” Around 9:30 p.m. we called in our own special team to consult with. My twins’ godmother, Karen Kotalik,(who i would trust with my life) her brilliant husband, E.J.,my dearest friend and Ronan’s godmother, Trish, her amazing boyfriend, Max and last but not least, my other BFF, Lauren, via telephone… who has been researching morning, noon, and night for me. We sat in the cafeteria for hours and hashed out numbers, results, treatments, side effects, doctors, hospitals, resources, etc…. I felt lost, scared and exhausted. It also may have had a little something to do with the fact that I’ve had about 5 hours of sleep in the past few days. Our doctor basically wanted an answer in 24 hours. I freaked. 24 hours to decided the fate of my precious little guy. How in the world did they expect us to come to such a huge decision so quickly? It seemed so unfair and cruel. But unfortunately, time is not on our side. And decisions have to be made sooner rather than later. We compiled a list of the people we needed to get in touch with for the next day. The best of the best doctors in neuroblastoma, hospitals, people who have been through this, etc…. We spent all of today making phone calls and getting Ronan’s information to all the right people. I was amazed at the positive responses we got from doctors all over who were willing to take their time to talk with us. After a morning spent researching, I went home and met up with Woody and we were both in agreement on what to do. The way that the pieces fell together was almost like a little bit of  magic/art/science/ and love. I’m not going to go into details about what road we are taking on here. That would take way too long and the details are very difficult to explain as a mom. I can tell you that after meeting with Dr. Wood again tonight, that he is in agreement with us that we have chosen the right path. Last night when we met with him Woody straight asked him, “If we do this treatment, is this what you would do for your son? ” He wouldn’t give him us an answer. Tonight with the different way we’ve chosen to go, Woody asked him the same question. His response was, “absolutely.” I know in my mind, body and soul that this is the right path for us to take. This is our best shot. Dr. Wood also said something tonight that will remind me that Ronan is no ordinary boy.  He told us out of all his patients he’s seen over the years, that he’s never seen anyone with the disease that Ronan has, act the way that Ronan is acting. Basically, Ronan should be acting like he is very, very, sick. This child is acting the complete opposite of that. If it weren’t for his black eye, incision across his head, the broviac catheter in his chest, you would never know that he is fighting for his life. This just proves what I’ve known all along about my beautiful little boy. He is a fighter, he is strong, and he is unlike anyone on this earth. My friend Lauren told me tonight after spending sometime with us that she physically felt something protecting us as soon as she walked into our hospital room. I couldn’t agree more. It’s almost like Ronan has his own private force field surrounding him at all times. It is a beautiful thing to see and feel. There is more to this than just this awful disease. Something bigger is out there and there is a reason why this is happening to us.

Thank you for following my blog and loving Ronan the way you do. Even the people who don’t know us at all. I am trying my best to read all of your comments and beautiful words. They are so comforting to me, especially when I am waiting around for Ronan to come out of anesthesia or back from test results. Mama needs to snuggle up with her little angel now. Goodnight to all my sweet angels out there. I will never be able to thank you enough for all you are doing. I am going to save that job for my Ronan Sean.

xoxo

Ronan with one of his angels, our Mimi Kay

About these ads
Previous Post
Leave a comment

18 Comments

  1. Rita Dickinson

     /  August 18, 2010

    I am so very glad you took the precious little time you had to research and consult trusted friends, and that you and Dr. Wood (my husband’s middle name) are comfortable with the course of treatment. And again, thank you for sharing Ronan’s progress toward health. Blessings.

    Reply
  2. Candyce Lindsay

     /  August 18, 2010

    Thank you for showing us all how to handle such a thing as this. I will pray that the angels God has around you all will be a fence against anything that harms and that only things that cure/heal come Ronan’s way! Blessings to you all and special kisses to Ronan.

    Reply
  3. Jennifer Wood

     /  August 18, 2010

    Again, I am in awe of your strength. Kiss that baby. Get some much needed rest. I love you.

    Reply
  4. Chris

     /  August 18, 2010

    You’re right. Ronan is completely surrounded and covered with prayers from all over. So many people who have never met your family are praying to The One Physician who can heal him. God will use all of those wonderful doctors and nurses. Ronan’s name is being brought before The Father over and over again. Thank you for your beautiful honesty. We are praying for you, Woody and the twins too.

    Reply
  5. Michelle Bunger

     /  August 18, 2010

    God has a plan for precious Ronan as he does for all of us. Stay strong and pray and love like crazy!!! You Thompsons are in my prayers tonight and always!!! Many Blessings!!!
    Goodnight, Michelle Bunger

    Reply
  6. Danielle

     /  August 18, 2010

    So glad you and Woody feel comfort in the next step of Ronan’s recovery. That is sooo important. Lauren and you are right though…Ronan is safe and and will always be and this is happening for something bigger. Love seeing the happy pictures of Ronan with W and Mimi K. Well Wishes Tonight. XOXO DD

    Reply
  7. Nicole E

     /  August 18, 2010

    Hi Maya,

    I am a good friend of Sarah T’s and also a client of your husband’s. Sarah had told me all about Ronan before, how he was her favorite little man to babysit! When she told me he was sick, my heart just ached for him and your whole family. I have a three year old little boy myself and can’t even begin to imagine what you are experiencing. Your posts are so inspirational and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. I wish you all the very best in this battle.

    Love,
    Nicole Engelbretson

    Reply
  8. Suba

     /  August 18, 2010

    words cannot express how i feel as a mom. But the strength you have shown is a clear indication of where your little Ronan gets his force field and courage. Hang in there. My prayers today are for you and your precious one. Take care. If there is anything, strangers like me can do, please tell me. Even come and read a book or clown around…whatever it takes to keep his spirit high. Or even ifu want to nap while someone can watch him…Take care.

    Reply
  9. Bless you all as you go through this with Ronan. I know Charlie and Kay from years ago. Our parish is holding all of you, especially your beautiful Ronan in prayer. You have made a decision about his care and don’t look back and question your decision, just know you have been led to make the decision that is right. Wishing you all God’s peace. The Rev. Kimball C. Arnold

    Reply
  10. Randy Barnes

     /  August 18, 2010

    Maya and family, I truly believe that the ‘force field’ you feel around Ronan’s room has to be the Holy Spirit watching over him. God’s will is being carried out. Believe it and Thank Him for it.:)

    Randy Barnes

    Reply
  11. Nance Harris

     /  August 18, 2010

    The force could very well be angels. They are real and do protect people and deliver messages. Maya, take care of yourself, sleep. You need to be there for Ronan so it is important that you take care of yourself. In the airplanes they say put the oxygen on yourself first so you can help others.

    Loved the pictures of Ronan with his friend Winston. Ronan’s eyes are penetrating and gorgeous. He’s darling.

    Reply
  12. Kent and Shelley Bunger

     /  August 18, 2010

    We are so encouraged at your being given clearly the path to take for Ronan’s treatment and ultimate cure. We are praying mightily for him, for you and for your family. You will probably never know the hero Ronan, you and Woody have become to us. Please, please know that we lift you up in our prayers everyday and have asked many more to do the same.

    Reply
  13. Maya and Woody,
    Not sure if my wife Lisa messaged you or not but another coincidence…Dr. Wood was Wil’s doc as well. What an amazing doctor and human being! He came to a baseball game of Wil’s in late April. The oncology group there at PCH is outstanding! You couldn’t be in better, more compassionate hands.

    Reply
  14. Amanda Herdt

     /  August 18, 2010

    Hi Maya. We heard from Mrs Burns about Ronan. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. Our thoughts and prayers are with you constantly. You are a rock for your little rockstar. I know this isn’t much but James misses Liam and Quinn very much and talks often of having them over for a play date and sleep over. Let me know if that would help you and them. Give a big kiss to that beautiful little boy. Stay strong. Sending much love to wrap around you all.

    Reply
  15. April McLaughlin

     /  August 19, 2010

    I know you don’t know me and Woody probably doesn’t remember me from high school but that’s OK because you don’t need to know or remember someone in order for prayer to work. We prayed for little Ronan tonight and will continue to pray. I have an 8 year old son named Coby, who is a strong “prayer warrior”. Once he realizes the need for prayer, he prays every single night.

    I would like to make one comment on one particular part of this post. I’m not sure who wrote this post but this person said, “It’s almost like Ronan has his own private force field surrounding him at all times. It is a beautiful thing to see and feel. There is more to this than just this awful disease. Something bigger is out there and there is a reason why this is happening to us.”

    Well, I would have to agree 100% with this statement; however, I would like to expand upon the meaning of it. Ronan’s “own private force field” is God Almighty. He has this precious little boy in the palm of his hand!! And yes, He is surrounding him at all times!!! Ronan is not alone. Something bigger is most definitely out there and there is a reason for this to be happening. We may never understand on this side of Heaven why certain things happen but if just one person comes to know Jesus Christ as their personal Lord and Savior because of this little boy, then it all has to be worth it. And YES, I would say the same thing, even if it were my little boy.

    I am most definitely not trying to preach to you but I just felt compelled to respond because I feel that you do realize there is a power out there…just not quite sure you really understand what that power is. Maybe you do but just in case, I wanted to share. I pray that God gives you a peace the surpasses all understanding!!!

    Much love and prayers to you and your family.
    God Bless,
    April McLaughlin
    (April Wheeler)

    You are all loved…even by people you don’t know. People that live clear on the other side of the United States. People that are praying for you, even as you read this.

    Reply
  16. Jill Bray

     /  August 19, 2010

    I know Ronan’s grandparents, Kay and Charlie, through work with the Junior League and Susan G. Komen for the Cure. I am so sorry that Ronan is going through this. My heart aches for him and for your whole family. Your blog is wonderful and your strength is amazing. I pray for the best for Ronan and for you all. Jill Bray

    Reply
  17. Maya,
    My heart goes out to you and Woody! I was showing friendsRonan’s beautiful face to friends last weekend, remarking how angelic he is…. via Fb. I am also a Sunnyslope alum. My prayers are with your family

    Reply
  18. Becky

     /  September 12, 2012

    …and something bigger indeed. You are the lifeline to finding a cure to this horrid disease!!!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

  • Instagram is my BFF

    Team meeting. #poppy #ronan #fucancer #titans #littleballers #weekendchamps #basketballislife @kimmieag17 Hijacked @knjoy's pen to write her letter to the Empire State Building. #poppy #ronan #poppyforpresident #fucancer #gettinshitdone #meow Who here things I'm getting on the red eye without taking this gigantic Hello Kitty pillow with us? Thinking probably not... #poppy #ronan #poppytakesnewyork #fucancer #theadventuresofpoppy/Pearl #notvisitingtheempirestatebuilding #hellokitty #meow @knjoy
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 24,155 other followers

%d bloggers like this: