” I love you mama. I love you sooo much.”

Those are this words I woke up to around 4 a.m. this morning. Ronan had wrapped his arms around my neck and was telling me he loves me. That’s the baby I know. He’s still in there fighting away with his heart full of love.

Tricia’s visit

Tonight I got to go and visit Ronan. Maya asked if I would write a little and tell you how it was. When I got there, Mom and Ronan were snuggly in bed and Dad was on a hunt for vanilla ice cream at Ronan’s request. Mom is busy keeping Ronan comfortable, he loves her to read to him, scratch his head, rub his feet and he especially loves to hear both mom and dad take turns singing to him. But as Mom mentioned before, he’s mad. He’s mad and doesn’t want to say much…and that cuts mom like a knife. But being mad is just what we like to see because this angry boy has already started the fight and couldn’t be braver and stronger. So strong, that he didn’t take any pain medication all day and was refusing to take his tylenol. I want to tell you all what else I saw tonight, and that is two parents who are like nothing I’ve ever seen. An unbreakable team stronger than any words can describe, committed to fighting through whatever it takes. Dedicated to their precious son and to supporting each other. Maya and Woody we all love you, you are not alone, we are all here to join the fight. RONAN, just like his name sounds, is a WARRIOR and is going to win against this evil cancer! Mom said it right, you picked the wrong kid to mess with, Cancer!!!!

All you need is love

As I sit here writing from my iPhone, I am trying to block out the screams and cries of a six year old boy, Even, who we are sharing a room with. Not sure what kind of cancer he has but he’s 2 weeks into treatment. His tummy is hurting, his legs are hurting and he wants to know why he has to take so much medicine. I hear the desperation in his mom’s voice and know her pain. I’m waiting to wake up from this nightmare because this can’t possibly be real.
Ronan is sleeping peacefully beside me, knocked out from the benadryl and tylenol with codeine. His body is twitching and I wonder what he is feeling. I hope he is dreaming about playing baseball or chasing his brothers. I would give anything to trade places with my baby. He has never done a thing wrong in his life and so does not deserve this pain.

Being alone during these nights I find myself looking back at my life before this. It was so perfect it was unreal. Did I take too much for granted?Absolutely. While I was home today I walked into my closet and was immediately filled with embarrassment and shame. All those clothes, shoes, purses…. and for what? None of that matters. None of that is real happiness.
Once we get through this and are home with Ronan, I have a new plan for how I will live my life with my beautiful family. A new life for all of us full of wanting and needing nothing except for the love of family and friends that surround us. Good night to all my sweet angels out there who are cheering us on. I love you all so much.

  • Instagram is my BFF

    Car wash babe. #poppy #ronan #poppyrooiloveyou #legsfordays #littlelady This just made my day. 
#Repost from @chloegoulden13
--- OKAY HI. So, as you probably know I am a huge advocate in raising awareness and funds for childhood cancer. Childhood cancer is the number one disease killer of our kids, with 46 kids being diagnosed a day and 7 dying a day in the United States alone. It receives next to no funding federally, and is swept under the rug because it is too sad. Well things have to change. The Ronan Thompson Foundation is a beyond amazing foundation in honour of Ronan Thompson who died at age 3. And through Taylor Swift and Maya (his mama) I've learned Ronan's story and become aware of the tragedy that is the world of childhood cancer. SEPTEMBER is childhood cancer awareness month and the colour is GOLD (official in HRM, HOLLA!🙌) and I intend to do my part. The #BeBoldGoGold campaign (created by Maya Thompson and Kassie Rehorn of the Ronan Thompson Foundation) is designed to spread awareness about this terrible disease in a fun way. Deck yourself out in gold and educate people, challenging them and your friends to do the same. This month I vow to do that... Through running. Throughout September, I will run as many races as need be to reach 50 kilometres (or 31.1 miles for all you American lovies) and spread awareness at each race. However, while awareness is great, funding is even better. So there will be a page set up where you can sponsor me throughout the month and support the cause. All money will go to the Ronan Thompson Foundation and the IWK Foundation to help kids locally and internationally, fight cancer. To learn more about it, go to www.facebook.com/chloesraceforgold or click the link in my bio. There will be a schedule, info and a place you can donate. Ronan, I am so sorry this happened to you. We will fix this broken world. #ronan #beboldgogold #theronanthompsonfoundation #iwk #halifax #fucancer #heshouldbehere Join us in the Be Bold Go Gold Challenge! Snap a pic of yourself all decked out in your gold and nominate some brave souls to do the same! @beboldgogold  I was nominated to do the #beboldgogold💛 and I nominate @mamamaya @knjoy and @woodythompson75. #rtf #empiregogold #ronan
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 24,154 other followers

%d bloggers like this: